A momentary lapse of strength

As you all may know, or even if you dont, or if you dont care....I've been on a diet. Here at Coaster Crew Mr. Novak and I entered into a contest we like to call the biggest loser. The goal was to lose as much weight as safely possible. We opened to you our faithful members who also were a little too large to fit on the coasters, and some of you responded. We were supposed to have this huge great prize, and an amazing weigh in at Hard Rock Park. As with a lot of things we do, we had no follow through and Hard Rock Park cut its hours. We let you guys down. I'm sorry. I think between Clint and myself we can put together a great prize for those who stuck it out without cheating. You see, both Clint and myself have used chemicals to help us perform better. Alli, to be exact. I've had great luck with it, and no pooping in my pants. Clint? Not so lucky.
So, on we went with the great diet. I dont know what happened to Novak, but he's still in the less than 20lbs area...maybe he's over that..no idea. I, however, reached the magic number of 40lbs total weight loss today. It's a great feeling to have your pants fall off, to have women looking at you with that "come hither" look, and to be able to fit into coasters again. On top of that it's had a great side effect of looking better naked, and not waking up in pain from aching knees and back.
It's been hard. I've been exercising on a regular basis, eating healthy, cutting out all the soda, candy, fat fried foods...everything bad. Eating carrots, fruit and other vegetables. One downside to this of course was the fact I had to give up wholly fattening, but terribly delicious food such as the decadent cheeseburgers and french fries of Five Guys burgers in Vero Beach. They are a bit of a chain, but goddamn are they good. So good in fact that I frequented them enough for the manager to know me by name.
So today, for the first time in 3 months, I ventured in and walked up to the manager.
"Erik? Is that you?" he said. Let me tell ya, that feels really good.
"Yeah, how've you been?"
"I'm great! Where the hell you been, and what happened?"
"Well...been on a diet. Lost 40 lbs."
"Thats terrific! You sure you want to do this then?"
"Oh yeah."
Normally I would order a bacondouble cheeseburger, two large fries and a coke. Enough for 2 people and then some. Today....slightly less. A little cheeseburger, no mayo, onions or mushrooms, a large fry, and a bottle of water. Yeah, some splurge, but let me say its hard to in good concience slip into that eating again. I've worked so hard, and it was a battle of wills to even go in. Let me also say that I had the entire family with me, and it was a split affair with the fries. So we get our food, and I open the bag. Dear lord...I had missed that warm grease smell so much. The first bite into the burger, I almost shed a tear. It was so fucking delicious. Why is it that things that taste so good are so bad for us? I could feel my cleaned out arteries shrinking away in pain, this is the stuff heart attacks are made of.
Fries were also a no no on the diet. I made short work of them.
It's simply amazing the things you take for granted, I never would have thought these fattening, artery clogging greaseballs to be anything close to heaven sent six months ago...but you take it away for a while. Damn, it's as close to sex as I want to get with my clothes on.
Even still, as I sit here basking in the after glow of the orgasmic love of food that I once again experienced for the first time in almost three months, I feel as if I cheated on my spouse...the and betrayed the relationship that I forged with healthy living. I only hope that she can forgive me, and wont punish me too badly on the scales next week.
Til next time...I've got to get to the toilet.
-Erik